Thursday, December 03, 2009

Relief

I admire passion.
I seek people out who have it.
I really love to be with people who are passionate about the same core ideas as me.
But I can admire (at least fundamentally) those who don't have the same core ideas, but who are equally passionate over their lives. I stand in awe of those who immediately say, "No! that isn't right...it can't be right...change it now." In equal measure, I can be horrified by it.
By saying it all so rashly, there wasn't time for reflection and decision...only reaction.
I do not applaud reactionaries...I myself struggle with it.
I see a lesson before me again that is a chance to squish my lifelong nemesis: reactive behavior.
The bossy teacher in me likes to say, "no" or "not now" or "never" at the first hint of deviation from the norm...but I've tempered it so much. My own little children have taught me to ask questions first before I judge and hand down the ruling.
"Wait a minute. Explain to me why you have to leave the classroom."
I have found that 8 times out of 10, kids have valid/justifiable reasons for what they do.
The problem, truly, is with adults.
Adults think they are "soooo grown-up." Nope, just different. for instance, you can't tell an administrator, "That's lunch detention, missy. I'll see you then and we'll have a chat about it." By which we really mean, "I'll straighten you out at lunch."
Too bad adults can't get detentions.
So, back to my nemesis...yes, I have found myself suspending judgement. Giving a new plan time before I've truly stepped on one side or the other, but KNOWING where I stand in the end. Knowing what I want the solution to feel like is key...
what a RELIEF to find myself giving time to REFLECTION.




3 comments:

sarah said...

such wise words :-)

Tammie Lee said...

HI Katie,
I really enjoyed this post. Plus you have inspired me to connect differently with a friend. Thank you.
I love the idea of giving adults detention. Go think about it then we will talk. Time for reflection is a huge gift. Years ago I remember learning that when I was uncertain about something I could say "let me get back to you with the answer to that". That was a huge gift! Children are such wonderful teachers.

JFKlaver said...

Oh, if only we all had enough courage to learn from children—the world's greatest teachers. You are very wise.